Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Making it more than a dream

Last Friday, America commemorated the 40th anniversary of Dr. King's assassination. There were the speeches, the platitudes, the words. Lots of words. Too many words, honestly.
Columnist E.J. Dionne write in this column that the death of Dr. King, along with RFK's assassination, began the end of the progressive movement that was gaining powerful momentum in our country. It's too bad: From Nixon on, we have de-evolved, dehumanized and de-communitized this country into "I got mine, so go screw yourself" cloaked under some very corrupted tense of conservatism. On a side note, I really doubt that the reality we find ourselves in is what Ronald Reagan or Milton Friedman had in mind. But no matter.

Then there were these kids. On a typical Spring night in the nation's capitol, tourists stream from the respective quadrants to converge upon the National Mall. Usually, they go see the Washington Monument and then head over to the Lincoln Memorial. I know that was the first thing I did when I first came here. On the steps leading up to honest Abe is a placard notating where King gave his "I Have a Dream" speech. These group of students were reciting that speech.
No TV cameras, no journalists that I could see. Just a group of students and teachers egging them on. It was nice in a way to see students read the entire thing.

Yet, as the tourists passed them by to check out Illuminated Abe, I have to wonder: How far are we really? While we might be on the cusp of electing the first African-American President (if the first viable female candidate doesn't destroy him first), the deviation is pronounced in D.C. I mean, it's really obvious. Yet, another development and another law change pushes low-income further and further out.

For me, race relations is an odd one. Technically, I'm half-Latino. Venezuelan, to be exact. My biological father is from Caracas, yet I have no identification or connection with the Venezuelan culture. None. I can't even speak Spanish. How bad is that? My maternal grandfather is part Choctaw, but I have no connection with that either.
Even coming from a very diverse part of this country, issues of race are still difficult to come to a pervading sense of awareness. I was 12 when the L.A. riots occured. I still remember my white friend being beat up by some black guys, while two black girls saw me and said "you better leave or else you're next." I was robbed by a black man when I was 17. I was on a walk and he asked to speak to me. He pulled a knife and told me he was going to kill me if I didn't give him my CD player. It was a stupid Walkman and I was going to die for that. Even now, it is difficult to acknowledge a black man who crosses me on the street.
These are my experiences, but I know many white individuals that can identify. In high school, a great teacher of mine told me that I was going to have a hard time getting scholarships because I had zero ethnicity. The truth was, I did have a great and grand ethnicity on my biological father's side, as well as being partially Choctaw Indian, plus various Euro-ethnicity's. Yet, I was white.

What encouraged me about Obama's speech on race and some cogent talk about race relations is that we as a country aren't directly addressing a major shift concerning race, but that we might be coming to a point where we can. In about 25 years, maybe less, "white" won't be a majority. There won't be a majority. When it comes to race, everyone will officially be a minority. There will be more of one group than another, but no one can claim majority rules. I respectfully offer that freaks a lot of white people out. It's no surprise that the loudest detractors of Rev. Wright were white men, probably Catholic and definitely part of the "Conservative" movement that stems from Nixon and William F. Buckley.
If we were honest with ourselves for just a second, I think we as "white people" could agree to two things. First, cultural assimilation has done the most harm to white people in America. What is a white person in America? Either it's WASP or white trash. The middle is suburbia, but even that falls along trash or treasure lines. There is no appreciation for native culture, be it German or Scandinavian or whatnot. The creation of "American" was a continuing process of accepting majority norms while taking from the novel and uniqueness of minority cultures. Yet, it has created two choices, white and off-white. So, we have come to this very odd paradox: The answer of what it means to be white is often the same as what it means to be American. This isn't reality, yet the perception is what is reported on Fox.
Second, we as a nation haven't been honest with ourselves that supply-side economics doesn't work for us. It might work for some other country, but not here. Limits are a good thing and the government (especially if it's a representative government like we say it is) is meant to be provide a social infrastructure. That hasn't happened and really, hasn't happened for quite some time. No one is honestly talking about stagnant wages. Why is the gap between expenses and wages so big? It's because we dismantled parts of the regulatory mechanisms of government in favor of the Free Market the Friendly Ghost. This has affected everybody, but when it affects white people, it does create resentment and yes, bitterness.

OK, enough with my treatise. For those that stumble upon this and want to send nasty anonymous notes to me, do so on this phrase. Race matters. Racism is the great sin of America and race is the great testament to America. I feel that Dr. King's true realization of his dream was that we can seek race as difference and diversity, not the catalyst for inequality. Those things that make us who we are: Race, gender, religion, sexuality are what creates difference. Difference is good. We don't want to get to a point where race doesn't matter. I want race to matter. Otherwise, humanity will be dull and boring. I want people to be judged on their character so they can achieve a dream. I want a government that has a safety net so that people don't declare bankruptcy because of medical bills or will struggle because of obscene profit margins and lack of sustainable wage growth.

I leave you with a segment of the last speech of King.

A-friggin-Men!!!

Sunday, April 13, 2008

"She Knows Better"

This isn't a partisan blog, but I must say that I'm excited to live in D.C. and be around at the Inaugural when Obama is sworn in as our next President.

Cherry Blossoms!



You can find more at my flickr photostream.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Calling for manly stuff....

I'm working on a writing project dealing with masculinity and manhood in this day and age. I'm on the prowl for books, articles and the like (i.e., no Porn sites, no ESPN) that deal with any of these topics:
Male Spirituality/Men and religion
Mythopoetics
Analysis on the effect of the Men's Movement, such as Promise Keepers, the Million Man March, etc.
Men's Studies
Male appeasement/approval
Why there aren't legitimate men's shampoo products available.


Or anything else that you think might be of use. Leave a comment and the Management thanks you.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Prince is playing Coachella?!?

And Roger Waters is doing Dark Side of the Moon? It's not fair. For those interested, see here.
Sigh.

Quote of the Day...

"When you ask a man to describe his 'perfect woman,' you usually wind up with a glorified golden retriever, or Mother Teresa in a thong."

From Shannonstamey.blogspot.com, quoted in today's Express.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Stopping for the violinist...

Washington Post Columnist Gene Weingarten's superb article on famed violinist Joshua Bell playing for about an hour in the L'Enfant Metro stop was award the Pulitzer. This article was fantastically written and brought about a lot of guilt to me in that I go through L'Enfant every so often, but more so, I'm at the point where I'm recycling my iPod music. Judging by conversations on the Metro today, I need to leave the iPod at home and tune in to the beauty that is everyone. Check out the story (and make sure to view the video!) here.

Yet another sign that I'm getting old...



My sisters are now 22 and 21 years old.
Wow.
Happy Birthday Danna and Amanda. I love you both greatly.

Monday, April 07, 2008

I guess the ring by spring exists outside the APU bubble...

Today, I found out that three of my friends are engaged. In addition to Sarah T becoming Sarah M and a couple of upcoming weddings, it must be spring.
So, congrats to Alexis and Lores for and their respective significant others and a big M.A.Y.A. Years congrats to Leeanne (Linterella) for her and Paul's engagement. Leeanne was a founding contributor, former Clauser and all-around fantastic woman. She has a great heart and so much going for her. You're loved by the M.A.Y.A. Years, Lint (write something soon!)

Sunday, April 06, 2008

YAWN.

It's raining again this Sunday.
Nothing major to report.
Will be back up to full strength later this week.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

A Call to Action

I usually don't like to do this, but I feel this is important.
Congress is debating the reauthorization of the President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR). The original plan allocated $15 billion to fight HIV/AIDS in Africa and worldwide. It has done wonders in getting people medicine and treatment, as well as go far in the fight against Global Poverty.
The new authorization would be for $50 billion, spread out until 2013. This is one of the things that President Bush has done quite well on and it's important that we keep a good thing coming.
Also, this is a great chance to advocate a change in a current injustice. The U.S. is one of the remaining countries that requires a special visa wavier to HIV-positive individuals that want to reside in the country. This was enacted by the late Jesse Helms two decades in the midst of AIDS paranoia and it's something that needs to be changed. The House is debate a proposition to include this into their debate of PEPFAR and it's important that we make right what has been done wrong.
ONE.org has more information, plus a list of your Congressional Representative if you're interested.
Thanks.

Monday, March 31, 2008

A Diamond in the Fish...

I've had the big thrill of reliving my high school days via Havalina Railroad Co. One of the big bands in the LBC scene in the 90s, Havalina put up their greatest hits free on their site. You can find it here.
It takes me back: Jason and I did a few shows with them, as well as them playing Youth Convention and all the A/G mucks getting mad because all the kids were parading around the stage during "This Train." Them, the Halo Friendlies, the Merbabies, Boy Wonder (would become Off the Record), All Day Long and the Bunkshooters were great bands and it brings back great memories.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Do women love these fierce invalids home from hot climates?

FINALLY. I finished Tom Robbins' book. It took forever, largely because I read it on and off while I was doing research, writing a thesis, plotting my escape East and whatever random chaos showed up. Finished it tonight. Super good. Once I finish off my current book pile, I want to read another Robbins manifesto. Anyone got any good recommendations?

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

More context is needed...

In addition to being an outstanding basketball player and comedic actor, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is an esteemed intellectual. He does a great blog at the LAT and write this blog for the HuffPost.

Four Stories for FourStory

Shameless plug, but I am located in a few other places as well, one of those being Four Story. Four Story is a webzine dedicated to issues of affordable housing and development, but with a perspective slightly devoid of facts and figures and more concerned with facts and profanity. I've written a bit for them and the latest bit is found here.

Word up.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

The Lord has risen...

He is risen indeed!

Today is Easter. It snuck up on a lot of people (myself included) because it was so early in the liturgical calendar.

I read this article in the NYT about Easter sermons and Obama's speech on race. Great article, you can check it out here.
Yet, there was one quote that really irked me.

The Rev. Leith Anderson, president of the National Association of Evangelicals and lead pastor of Wooddale Church in Eden Prairie, Minn., said he would not be preaching about the racial issues raised by Mr. Obama’s speech and expected few other evangelical pastors to, either.
“Easter is about Easter and the Resurrection of Jesus, and it’s pretty unlikely that any other topic would eclipse that,” Mr. Anderson said. “That’s not to say those other topics aren’t important, but this is the most important.”
Most evangelical churches, he said, “are Bible-driven, not current-events-driven."


To me, this encapsulates my problem with my old Pastor recycling his Easter sermon (in fact, he recycled all his sermons) and the disconnect of the churches I grew up in. Easter is about new life, both in this life and in whatever is to come. Why can't we be both? We can't we celebrate a living God and a risen Christ as well as bring light to the darkness of humanity, without the covert missions to "get them saved?" Isn't Easter about the power of one-ness over sameness? The power to confront those things that cause death to us (such as racism) and yet belief that new life is looming?

Anyways. I pray that today, we celebrate the chance of new life, the ability for all things to become new.
I pray that today, our cries over lost dreams, betrayal and disappointments will be replaced by tears of wonder and delight.
I pray that today, as we celebrate the Risen Prince of Peace, that we have peace. The awareness that everything needed to thrive in life is within our grasps.

He has Risen and continues to bring resurrection power to those who yearn for it.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Well, my questions are answered...

Now, if only R.E.M. could use this new-found clarity to actually make a good record post-Monster.

Friday, March 21, 2008

A message for Good Friday...

Taken from Andrew Sullivan.

"Any authenticity that we are going to have as persons of faith and any authority that we are going to have as witnesses to the gospel of Jesus Christ will come because of our exposure to bruises and scars. There is no other way to authenticity. There is a certain counterfeit pose that one may maintain, but as to an entrance into the full, the true authority, into the glorious liberty of the sons of God, that comes by exposure and by wounds. There is no other way. If one looks back at those who have deeply affected their generation, the discovery will be made that almost without exception they did it against some minus, some ache, some pain in their own lives ...

At some time, who can say when, there will be a crown of thorns pressed down upon your head. It may be some private anguish. It may be some profoundly disturbing condition in your own family. One cannot detail the direction whence the affliction will come, but when it does, you will have every right to rail against it and to cry out against that kind of providence, even to argue with God, to withstand him to the face ...

But do one other thing. Take it. Accept. For was it not our Lord's word that the cup he looked into, the awful agony which waited for him, did not come from unfriendly hands: "The cup which my Father hath given, shall I not drink of it?"

I promise you this, if you can take whatever deep hurt that occurs in your life and hold it up before God and say to him, even in bitterness, of this which you despise and this which you hate, "If there is anything you can do with it, take, and use it."

I promise you, you will be utterly amazed at what will occur," - Gardner C. Taylor, sermon delivered February 1, 1978.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

"Maybe this is how the concerto ends..."

The Band's Visit is a beautifully nuanced and subtle film. From Israel, it would have been nominated for Best Foreign Film but because of dumb Academy rules regarding language (the film features Arabic, Hebrew and English), it didn't. Too bad.
It's short but incredibly sweet. I highly recommend it.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

D.C. from the lens...



I have an old-school camera, so it's going to take a bit to get these photos on here. I'll get a Flickr account soon. In the meantime...






...by the way, how does one put frames on these things? (Ed. note: Never mind. Just saw it in final version.)

A real speech that is rooted in reality...

I urge you to watch this. Not because I want to vote for Obama (even though that would be nice if you're in Pennsylvania right now!) but because a real debate on race is so, so important.



Saturday, March 15, 2008

Calling all M.A.Y.A. cooks!

I am in need of some recipes!

I left my cookbook at home and I can scrouge through Food Network's site, but I don't want to. So, I'm inviting any and all calls for good recipes out there. If your recipe is picked, it will be featured on this blog. FYI: I'm not a big fan of fish, but I'll give it a shot if it sounds good and vegetarian dishes are also welcome.

The Management thanks you.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Getting our stories straight....

(NOTE: I had written this for a possible publication, but I honestly forgot about it until I saw it tonight. So, this is the official publication. Comments always welcome.)

We need to get our story straight.

At the New Hampshire primary debate, Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards asserted that approximately 20-30 million jobs would be lost in the next two decades. Those greatly affected will be college graduates. There wasn’t any rejection of that argument, instead an eerie acknowledgment loomed on the debate stage. Articles speak to the looming student loan crisis, while other research recommends that potential college-bound students consider blue-collar work. In short, the future isn’t so bright for the educated and more so, the over-educated.

That’s not what I was taught in junior high school. On the cusp of adolescence, teachers and parents told this tale: Do well in high school, take Advanced Placement classes and work really hard to be admitted into a good college. Go to college, work really hard, pick a good major and graduate. Upon graduation, there will be great jobs to select. If you want even more success, go for the graduate degree.

The moral of the tale told to most American students is simple, education breeds success. No doubt, this is a true statement. However, it’s lacking the hidden emphasis that drives the point home, education breeds economic success. The more educated one is, the better off economically one will be.

Because of this, record numbers go to college and record numbers are now in graduate schools. Record numbers have taken on six-figure student loan debt and record numbers are striving for professional jobs in the economy.

Yet, observers are pointing to a downward slide, due to globalization and the changing times. A different narrative is being told; a story of opportunities going overseas, of instability and corporate needs over worker needs. It’s business. It’s the future.

Which story is right? With all due respect to Senator Clinton, words do matter. It is narrative that is the mechanism to find meaning and the American narrative is one of opportunity and fulfillment. The narrative told today to young adults beginning careers and struggling to find fulfilling work is the antithesis of the narrative told yesterday to students overextended in homework, school and service clubs and athletics in order to gain entry into the right college. When those question the accuracy of the story, they are given the afterword: Go get more education, take out more loans, and go further into debt and confusion. To be sure, many post-graduate students take on additional education for the right reasons, yet much of the predominate story uses graduate education as a delay into the changing work force.

What we have are dueling narratives. One story promises security if all the instructions are followed correctly, while another story promises uncertainty in a transitioning economy and world turning on variability. In both cases, twentysomethings and thirtysomethings are left with questions complex and simple: What is the story that I want to follow? What is the narrative to which I need to listen?

If the American Dream is a dream of opportunity and the American narrative is a story of fulfillment, then we must make sure the stories line up to reality.

Monday, March 10, 2008

I now know why Monks like the quiet...

There is nothing worse that sitting next to a screaming child when trying to write about religion.
More so, it’s precarious sitting in a busy coffeehouse, complete with the wi-fi flickering, the internet radio playing bad songs that need to remain in the ‘70s and still having the screaming child bellow her woes right in your ear.
Perhaps it is the notion of monastic solitude one hopes for when trying to concentrate on writing about faith, straining to hear the voice of God. Of course, that’s because God is only prone to speaking in a whisper, at least in the post-Acts sense.
I’ve been trying to write about a new study by the Pew Center of Religion and Public Life that studied the new religious landscape of Americans. In the study (which you can find here if you're interested), researchers discovered some very interesting shifts and changes in thinking of religion and identity.
Yet, the screaming children are driving me nuts.My friend Jennifer told me that in the first two years of a child’s life, parents teach a child to walk and talk. For the remaining time, parents teach the child to sit down and shut up.
I try not to sermonize everything, but I find it so hard to imagine Christ actually engaging screaming children. This is the kingdom of God? The shrieks of “He breathed on me!” are the keys to Heaven?
Nevertheless, the children have calmed down a bit and my nerves are a little less frayed. The kids are cute, well, all kids are cute. Supposedly.
It makes me wonder how I’ll be as a father. That’s assuming of course that I can get my act together and get a girl to love me. Or is it the other way around: she has to convince me to love her? Eh, I’m in my late 20s and I still don’t know. Maybe that’s the beauty of it.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

The message behind the messages....

I don't put this up to offend, but this is too funny. From Andrew Sullivan's blog:

Friday, March 07, 2008

Blessed are those who make peace...


Today, the Christian Peace Witnesses for Iraq held worship services in D.C. and across the country to continue the protest against the War and the Occupation in many parts of the world where we have no business being there. There was also a rally near the Capitol, but it was rainy and the singers were pretty cheesy. That said, the worship service was really nice.

During the Eucharist at Christ Church, I found myself singing a song in my head that I haven't thought about in a very long time.

He is our Peace
Who has broken down every wall
He is our Peace
He is our Peace

I can remember Mom singing that in choir and all the old folks at Glad Tidings singing in pseudo-unison. Here, it echoed a call to end to war in Iraq and create a new shift in thinking and being. The homily, given by an Episcopal priest from L.A., highlighted the passage in Scripture where James and John asked Christ if they could sit at each side of him in Heaven. In response, Christ told them that they didn't know what they were talking about and most likely, they didn't want to know either.

I imagine Christ saying to them with eyebrows raised: Do you really want that power? More so, do you really want the responsibility of sitting next to me? You know that everyone is going to be looking to you for everything. It's gonna take more than zeal and mastery of thin theology to really make the good stuff happen.


The service reminded me again of what the representative from the Desmond Tutu Foundation said at one ICUJP meeting. Peace is awareness and the knowledge of awareness. The awareness that a person has everything s/he needs to live life. All the necessities and the abilities to get what they need and want. Clean air to breathe, clean water to drink, viable shelter, a job with a living wage, an education if it is so desired, and ultimately, the awareness to have and share love.

It strikes a stronger chord for me when I think about peace and peacemaking that way.
Peace is not the warm fuzzy brought on by a warm blanket and a hearty dinner nor is peace the wanton sense of naivete when acting as an ignorant fool.

Peace is active, conscious, intentional. Peace guides the steps toward meaningfulness.

That peace. Do I have it in my own life and in my own heart? Am I truly aware that I have everything I need to live life and live it well? All the necessities and the opportunities to make it so?

In many ways, yes, I do. As a Christian, I believe that Christ is the center of my peace and his teachings and his essence have given me the ability to have peace. But that isn't just my gateway to Heaven (assuming Heaven as a real place exists) or is it my leverage against those wild and crazy "non-believers."

Truly, if I can make peace for myself, then I must make peace for others. I have to do everything in my power to ensure that others can have the awareness to live life well. That isn't just simple (read: easy, lazy, dumb, insensitive and ludicrous) shouting many call modern evangelism, but truly being a peace maker. What can I do to make sure people have access to clean water? What can I do to help others get a micro-loan to start a business? What can I do to fight for a living wage for work and health care for all? What can I do to be truly for life and for choice, more than judging personal decisions for the sake of hollow politics? Any of the multiplicity of causes and issues that are taken up are worth evaluating and thinking about; that is making peace.

Blessed are those who are truly aware.

Standing in the rain, listening to some weird musician sing about how the economy is affected by ecology, gathering with activists that come out to these rallies to get arrested in hopes to making a point to someone with voter clout, hearing the statistics again: 4,000 troops dead, almost one million Iraqis killed, nearly 4 million are displaced, a $3 trillion dollar war, a President who intends to spend his last year in office making sure everyone knows he's in charge and "has a lot to do," I heard my Mom and the congregation singing.

He is my Peace
Who has broken down every wall
He is my Peace
He is my Peace.

(Ed. note: Photo added.)

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Politics and math

Again, this isn't a partisan blog and I usually don't read Daily Kos, but they have a great post on the math involved in delegate counts. You can read it here for yourself.

Mathematically, it'll take a whole lot for Clinton to win. Chances are, she won't. There are many folks that want her to drop out. I don't for two reasons: the continued debate and vetting process is good for our country (as I am convinced that either one of them will defeat McCain in the general) and this process is important because we as a nation need to make sure that every vote counts and what one person does on the ballot does in fact matter.

In America, politics isn't about leading, it's about winning. Sadly, that will continue as long as we have vested interests that dominate the discussion for the few (read: rich and corporate) and a media that continually exhibiting traits of a cutter.

Monday, March 03, 2008

And the word of this journey is....

My friend Kirsten sent me a copy of a proposal she's working on and she used the word rhizomatous.

Hmmmm, never heard that word before, so on www.dictionary.com, it says:

producing or processing or resembling rhizomes.

A rhizome is:
A horizontal, usually underground stem that often sends out roots and shoots from its nodes. Also called rootstalk, rootstock.

From the Greek, to cause to take root.

I've sorta settled in my home for at least the next few months. I say sorta settled because I stuffed two suitcases full of clothing, shoes and other little things and came on in. Right now, I'm sleeping on the floor. Hopefully, I'll steal Paul's mattress as he leaves for the Bay Area tomorrow.
Plus, I've never been one for settling. In deference to Pastor Glenn, there are two kinds of settling: the kind that you're always striving for something better and the kind where you stay in one place and take root. In a sense, I'm unsettled in both areas.
Already, I've made some contacts and gotten some leads. It's fantastic, but I'm striving to make sure that I don't give off the impression that I want to meet people for the exclusive purpose of getting a job. I want a job, for sure, but I also want to meet people just to meet people.

It's funny how my mind has been trying to process the initial stages of moving here. Part of it is so adventurous and so there is a greater sense of flexibility that occurs. All the things that go wrong are all part of the fun and part of the story that gets told with beer in the aftermath.

Yet, I'm trying to figure out where to set boundaries. After all, if I'm giving this at least an Administration, the Administration has to know where I stand. I walk around the District and see how people dress and how everyone talks and drinks their Starbucks and talks on the phone. Points of reference, I suppose. I have vowed with every fiber within me not to become a "suit" and that's still on. I think I can figure out a way to wear the costumes and not become the part.

It figures that there must be a psychological element to rhizomes. According to Carl Jung:

"Life has always seemed to me like a plant that lives on its rhizome. Its true life is invisible, hidden in the rhizome. The part that appears above the ground lasts only a single summer. Then it withers away—an ephemeral apparition. When we think of the unending growth and decay of life and civilizations, we cannot escape the impression of absolute nullity. Yet I have never lost the sense of something that lives and endures beneath the eternal flux. What we see is blossom, which passes. The rhizome remains. (Prologue from "Memories, Dreams, Reflections")

Amen, Carl.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Time to go...

Well, this is it.
Tomorrow, this M.A.Y.A. is going East. It won't be long before I'll be forced to consider myself a full-fledged adult. I'm actually a bit excited for it. I'm looking forward to going gray, but that is easily tempered by my sadness in my looming bald spot.

I'm trying to remember how I felt when I left for San Angelo. It seems like ages ago: so much has happened since that decision and that destination.
I remember events. It was New Years and I went to a party with a bunch of people from Barnes and Noble. My friend Pamela was completely hammered and she professed her love for me. I'm pretty certain that she poured out her adoration because of the booze, but no matter. This one girl that I really like wasn't there and this other girl I liked was there, but was in a heated conversation with another guy. Heated as in confrontational, not to be disturbed.

Jason was house-sitting and I spent New Years and a few other nights there. I'm still sworn to silence about one night in particular, but it still comes up in awed laughing fits.

During the last Sunday at church, I stood in front of the congregation while people prayed for me. The only recollection of the prayer was Pastor Tom saying, "Thrust him out, Lord! Thrust him out!" At my left, Pastor Glenn was laughing.

I remember going on a date with Mariam. We went to Steamers and the Rockin Taco. We listened to KCRW on the ride home. I could have stayed for her.

Before I left, I had lunch with Pastor and he told me that if it didn't work out, I could always come back home.

Even though I remember events, I don't remember feelings. I just got in a car, turned on "Take it Easy" and drove. The story was so outlandish, the circumstances so unlikely, just taking the trip was wild enough. Romantic and diffuse, the experience fulfilled its definition.


I did come back home and I have been in Los Angeles for almost 4 years. I never returned back to Steamers Cafe, even though that was my place. Falling in love with Long Beach, I swore I found my pond to swim in. Things coalesced and life codified.

Of course, that didn't last long. I'm not rehashing all of it, but I can tell you the end/beginning. It was at the Indianapolis Zoo on a bench in front of the gorillas. Kate and I were talking about God and I had presented my theological treatise to her. She can tell you it was quite something. I was quite impressed with myself. She wasn't. We ended up on this bench and we sat close for just a second, then moved on. In that moment, it ended and started.

So, a little more than two years later, I leave again. This time, I'm not leaving home because I don't consider Los Angeles my home. Really, the roots I had are now exposed in the sun. Church, career, friends, family...it's not the same. My thesis talked about identity construction and religion. I feel like I've reconstructed myself in a way: going to D.C., still being single, finding no solace in the forms of Christianity I grew up in, not going into the ministry (but this one might still have a happy ending), leaving the newsroom. More deeply, that treatise I gave Kate proved to be askewed. Not by much, but now with one new qualifier at the start: I don't know and I'm fine with that.

Well, there it it. As Karina wrote to me, it's good to obey the inner nudge. Inklings and nudges, a wink and a nod. At least it saves paper.

The wide world of whiteness....

Gregory Rodriguez of the L.A. Times wrote a column about stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com. A tongue-in-cheek blog, it really does hit on all the things white people do and don't do.
Try to read it seriously, but not too seriously. Honestly, some many of those things are true.
Rodriguez brings up the issue of "white people" becoming a minority in the U.S. I think I heard that by 2050, most citizens will be from Asia, Latin America or Africa.
It does bring up an interesting discussion on white culture. What is white culture? is it either being white trash or being Westside hipster. Often, it is an either/or scenario. More so, what is it to be white? European? Icelandish? Variations of Native American?
Something worth thinking about.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

the 2nd Annual M.A.Y.A.Years Oscar picks!!!!!

I know you've been waiting for this and I'm never one to disappoint when it comes to excessive glamour and glitz.

This year was a good year for movies. Several strong movies came out at the end of the year and there was a good mix all-in-all. I'm still peeved my parents made me watch "Enchanted" and I'm happy to have continued my vows to avoid Lindsay Lohan at all costs.

So, here are the major categories and the picks:

Original Song:
Should win: "Once" was simply exceptional and it's a damn shame that more songs weren't nominated. Instead we have Cinderella in New York.
Will win: Probably "Once" as I'm hoping all the "Enchanted" songs will cancel each other out.

Foreign Language Film:
No picks, just a note: the academy really, really needs to revamp this. Because of the stupid rules, films like "Persepolis" and "The Band's Visit" aren't in this. Stupid academy.

Documentary Feature:
Should win: "No End in Sight." This movie captured the essence of everything that went wrong in Iraq. It's terrifying and incredibly sad. "Sicko" was superb as well, except when it went into dancing with Fidel Castro mode.
Will win: Probably "No End in Sight," but "War/Dance" might make an upset.

Cinematography:
Should win: "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" was a complex and lush film, beautifully filmed to show the true tragedy of locked-in syndrome and the majesty of imagination. "There will be Blood" was stark and gripping in its summation of capitalism and oil. The filming was fantastic.
Will win: Probably "Atonement," by the way, did anyone see this? I tried to avoid it like the plague.

Animated Film:
Should win: I didn't see "Ratatouille," but I probably will. But "Persepolis" was amazing.
Will win: "Ratatouille."

Adapted Screenplay:
Should win: Hard category, because they're all good. I'm going on a limb and saying that Sarah Polley's adaptation of Alice Munro's short story was stunning, sad and redemptive all at once.
Will win:
Coen Brothers did hit the marks with "No Country for Old Men."

Original Screenplay:
Should win: The strongest category by far. Yay for originality and creativity. In the end, "Juno" stands out, with "Lars and the Real Girl" a very close second.
Will win: "Juno."

Supporting Actress:
Should win: I didn't see "American Gangster" and "Gone Baby Gone," but Amy Ryan is great in "The Wire." "Michael Clayton" is a great movie and Tilda Swinton is phenomenal in what her role is in the mess the movie portrays. But Cate Blanchett is the reincarnation of Bob Dylan that makes "I'm not There" plausible. If she doesn't look or sorta sound like Dylan, the other portrayals of Dylan-esque will won't make sense unless one is a major fan.
Will win: Blanchett.

Supporting Actor:
Should win: Javier Bardem is scary as hell. Didn't see "Jessie James," but I heard that was good. Tom Wilkinson was terrific as always, but he's one of those actors that is going to suffer from "terrfic as always" syndrome.
Will win: Bardem.

Best Actress:
Should win: I'm not sure. All are good in their own way. Didn't see "La Vie en Rose," but I heard the movie was uneven. Missed out on "The Savages," and I'm kicking myself for that. I heard "Elizabeth" sucked too, but Julie Christie really did a great job in "Away from Her."
Will win: Christie, but Cotillard could pull off the upset.

Best Actor:
Will win and should win: No question, Day-Lewis was freakishly terrific.

Best Director:
Should win: The second strongest category. All are really good. If I had it my way, I would give it to Schnabel. The vision of the movie, the process of storytelling and the implmentation was simply stunning. The same can be said for Anderson and the Coen Bros., but there's something just a little different about "Diving Bell." Sad not to see Tim Burton here.
Will win: Eeek, I'm really not sure, but I'll go with the Coen Bros. Well deserved for an incredible body of work for for the Academy to finally recognize duel directors.

Best Picture:
Should win: I'm going with "Juno." There was just something amazing and simple about this movie. "There will be Blood" was exquisite, as was "No Country for Old Men."
Will win: You read it here first (or maybe ninth, but who's counting?); "Michael Clayton" will win and here's why: "No Country" and "Blood" will cancel each other out and no one still wants to vote for a comedy. That leaves "Atonement" and "Clayton." "Clayton" is a drama that reflects our times better than the British flick and Clooney is more of a movie star than Kiera Knightly. So, the Academy goes to the morally ambiguous fixer.


For an added bonus, here are my picks of the best movies of the year:
Juno
Once
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
There will be Blood
The Lookout
I'm Not There
No End in Sight
Lars and the Real Girl
Before the Devil Knows You're Dead
Knocked Up

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Migration is always an issue of space

This went out to the masses tonight. It's my big news of the day.

Dear Friends,

In Salem, West Virginia, it is illegal to leave home without knowing where you are going.

This, according to “Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader,” is a law that is a bit loony. Indeed, I’m not sure how the town would regulate that ordinance. Does the Sheriff check everyone’s GPS systems? Circles drawn on the map? Shopping list?
No matter. I’m sure in a small town, everyone is up on everyone’s business, so it’s quite easy to know where people are off to in the middle of the night, or for a “long weekend.”
(By the way, if you have never had the pleasure of reading any of the “Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers,” I highly recommend you do so. It is one of the sources where I have learned the most lessons about life, in addition to the Bible and the Bold and the Beautiful.)

It does bring up an interesting scenario: what if you were required by law to know where you are going? In all decisions big and small, from RiteAid to the wedding chapel, you had to have the direction set before you launched, so to say. Not only did you have to have direction, but you had to have directions: addresses, numbers, account balances, car miles, metro tickets, words of wisdom, dotted lines, signatures and goodbyes. All the little dots that we connect consciously and flippantly that move us along in the line/circle/rhombus we live on a daily basis.

Logically speaking, it makes perfect sense. You take the good and take the bad, mash them up, pick them out of a hat, weigh the pros and the cons, talk to loved ones, converse with strangers and make a decision. With enforcement looking over your shoulder, it is rest assured that the decision will be well thought out and executed.

But what about “those” decisions? You know what I’m talking about: the ones that are solely and comprehensively based on an inkling. Not even a full feeling, but an inkling. The flutter of the heart when she walks in the room or the raised eyebrow at hearing about a job opportunity. How your hands get clammy and you unconsciously take a step back, then two steps forward. Those decisions. Surely the law or any other logical system can’t truly account for those.

What about those decisions that seem almost primal, like the urge to migrate? We still do migrate; move to warmer temperatures, move for better changes or move to flee crisis. More than anything cultural or political, it is almost inherent in every human being to move if the times and life calls for it. While we are always moving, the question is often of what and where and who and why are we moving towards.

Well dear friends, I bring this up because this process has been on my brain for a long time. I saw an exhibit at the Museum of Latin American Art in Long Beach that dealt with migration. One of the pieces included several photos of shoes, compasses, pencils, food and memories that were left behind. It was called Migration is always an issue of space. That’s so true. New space, open space, expanding space: isn’t that what people want? Well, I know that it’s what I’m looking for.

So, I’m migrating again. I’m not going to Salem, West Virginia, but rather Washington, D.C. I’m leaving Los Angeles on February 27 and setting up shop in the nation’s capitol.

I bring up directions because I don’t have a whole lot of those right now (less is more and more costs more, right?), but I do feel I have the inkling. My past travels have enlightened me on how to deal with cows, but I now look forward to the new challenge of dealing with jackasses (cue your favorite rim shot here). Wow, that was a really bad joke. I’ll blame learning life lessons while reading in the bathroom for that one.

So, the adventure continues. A new space, new place, new faces and a new administration to anticipate. The email addresses and phone number are still the same and once things get more solidified, I’ll update y’all. As always, I am deeply thankful and grateful to you for your friendship and kindness.

In the meantime, if you can’t get enough of all things Plunk, here are some extra dishes I’ve baked up:

Stuff for the Norman Lear Center:
http://blog.learcenter.org/2007/10/radioheads_tip_jar.html#more
http://blog.learcenter.org/2007/08/u2charist.html#more

Stuff for Four Story:
http://www.fourstory.org/pages/stories/091-plunkett-lakewood.htm
http://www.fourstory.org/pages/stories/079-plunkett-bellflower.htm

For the fans of Donald Miller and “Blue Like Jazz,” his cohorts created the Burnside Writers Collective and they finally ran my article:
http://www.burnsidewriterscollective.com/social/2008/02/discriminating_tastes.php

And as always, the M.A.Y.A. Years:
themayayears.blogspot.com

I’ll be blogging from M.A.Y.A., plus I’ll be doing more articles for Four Story on development in D.C., plus I’ve got a bunch more stuff in the works, so check it out.


Truly yours,
Mike

Give it to the pregnant teenager!!!!

The official M.A.Y.A. Years Oscar picks will be coming shortly (please exhale. It's for your good.), but clearly, the viewing audience knows that Juno should win. (It really should, it was quite good.)

In other news, things are rapidly coming together in terms of this M.A.Y.A. going East. More to come shortly as well.

Monday, February 18, 2008

the GLUE that holds cities together...

I heard about the Great Lakes Urban Exchange a little while back and it's really cool. Started by two M.A.Y.A.s, GLUE hopes to help shape the debate about the development in post-industrial Great Lakes region. Fantastic stuff.

I've been into development issues since I've started writing over at Four Story. Issues of urbanism and community are so important, especially in the light of rapid change in cities, trying to shift to the new economic winds.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

the journey on newsprint...

Today was a bit of a milestone for me: I recycled most of my own newspaper clippings.
I still have my portfolio, but all the papers that I have saved for close to four years are now in the recycle bin near the Iacaboni Library.
Just like that. It was a trip going through them once more, remembering what I had done and what I should have done better. That subhead is too big. That front didn't turn out right. Eh, maybe Toni was right about this one page. Just that one.
Included in the pile were all my notes from the Texas Theater project. Lint will know about this, but while in San Angelo, I ended up writing an expansive article on the Texas Theater, the main movie palace in downtown. It was my attempt to try and understand this place I called home for 14 months and maybe my way to try and get Angeloans to know about me.
It was sad to throw the notes away: part of me wanted to keep them, just to always have them. Nevertheless, I have the memories and the experience, plus the final product, so my work was done, as were those notes.
I did promise Glen that I would return to San Angelo once the theater was renovated, if it ever would be. Last time I heard, it's aiming for fall of this year.
I can't wait.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Raise a Valley girl in the way she should go....

Clearly, this poor child won't depart from it. Thanks to Karina for passing this along.

Monday, February 11, 2008

No, Se no puede....

Well, I think we know what the spin against McCain is going to be in the general election.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

couple of thoughts about super tuesday...

1. All politics is local and once again, that is proven true. Here in Los Angeles County, where Clinton carried it strong, the mayor was a campaign co-chair, as well as influential congresswoman Maxine Waters and County supervisor Gloria Molina. That is a large constituency, particularly Latino. I read over at Talking Points Memo that the endorsement of city mayors was the most influential in key cities. I don't doubt it.
2. This election is going to truly ride on this idea: will a movement translate into votes? Meaning, young voters are coming out in droves for Obama and while it appears that no Republican candidates are attempting to acknowledgment their existence, it comes down to the fundamental adage that old votes, young protests. Hence, Clinton can gain more than Obama, especially if yoting drives at colleges haven't yielded positive results.
3. What I think it is going to happen with the Democrats will be a near-mirror of the 2000 election. Remember, America isn't a direct democracy. It isn't majority rules, but rather representative and proportional. If it comes to a brokered convention, the key will be what they call superdelegates; party elites that can vote however the hell they want. So, who will stay with Bill Clinton (because that is what it comes down to) or go to the new guy.
4. I feel like I should apologize on behalf of the national media. They really don't know what they're doing.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Tuesday is super duper!

Go vote if it's your turn to vote!!!

Rev. Jim Wallis spoke at All Saints last night in support of his new book, The Great Awakening.

It was quite good. I like Sojourners and what he has to say, but I do have to say that some people make really stupid comments in the name of Biblical interpretation or whatnot. Oh well. I commented to Joy that I wonder where people learn theology. Of course, I think of my own background and I know that answer all too well.

No matter...back to planning a move.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Do we love ourselves or are we in love with ourselves?

Nice editorial from I'm guessing the school paper of the University of Western Ontario on whether our generation just can't enough of our own greatness or if it's something else.

I've never really known what to think of this degree. It's difficult to compare generations because each generation constructs its identity in relation to what is going on. We didn't have a depression (well, not yet at least) and did have to defeat Fascism. But, we have been the beneficiary of great wealth and growth, even if it isn't completely adjusted for inflation.

Thoughts?

Monday, January 28, 2008

One for the money

Alrighty, the date is set. Let the countdown begin!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

In speech and debate, we call this "kicking ass and taking names."

No matter your political preferences, Obama is a master at giving speeches. This might be his best yet.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

The Messy Commons

Last night, Rev. Billy spoke and people listened.

A theater troupe out of New York City, Reverent Billy and the Stop Shopping Choir tour the world and perform "interventions" on various consumer stops. He was the grand marshal at Pasadena's Dooh-Dah parade and he made another stop at All Saints. He is the subject of "What would Jesus Buy?" both a book and a documentary.

Not a real pastor but speaking the truth like an old-school prophet, he talked about what does peace look like. Really. Is peace just the absence of war and violence? If and when we withdrawl our troops from Iraq and everywhere else, does that mean we have peace? No, peace is not the absence but rather the presence. It is the fulfillment or the awareness of the pieces of living. Similar to the amazing presentation given by the Desmond Tutu Peace foundation, peace is the awareness one has that every tool needed to live well is available and at their disposal.

For Rev. Billy, the marketplace has been replaced by the supermall. The marketplace wasn't just the market, simply to buy some fruit and go home. It was the centerplace of community. People talk, engage, argue, rebut, refrain, kiss, make up and become better humans. It was in the commons that language created culture. He used the metaphor of the stable and the manager to capture the re-invention of peace. The kings went to the baby, the bastard child of two young adults that weren't in the conventional model. It was more than a photo-op for Hallmark, it was a moment enshrined in eternity.

Yet, we are consumers and we find meaning in products. Corporations, the transnational ones, are our new empires. We copy and manipulate the human experience to brand.

Yes, yes, this is all true and all abstract. Of course, we don't like overspending. Of course, our allegiance to deficits to create false profits is ruining us. Of course, America has created an economic model that will destroy the world when the rest of the world tries to emulate it because Radio of America told them this is the best model of meaning. Of course, of course.

Rev. Billy gave an answer. Simple, yet radical. He said that in our private lives, we all know and most have peace. We communicate in loving homes, we make love to our beloved, we teach our children well. Privately, peace abounds. The question is how do we make public the private? Public peace. Commons peace.

We need the commons again.
I need the commons again.

Rev. Billy also said that everyone should recite the First Amendment every day, so here it is:
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Messy. But real is messy.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Hate being sick and unemployed...

What is the point of a cover letter?

Seriously, it is becoming the bane of my existence at the moment. In three paragraphs, I'm supposed to introduce myself, tout my experiences and give the future employer enough warm fuzzies to give me a ring so I can bomb the interview?

Eh.

(Being sick sucks also. Being sick and trying to write cover letters is an exercise in blunted madness.)

Monday, January 14, 2008

Measuring unemployment...

There's a great article in the New Yorker about the model for measuring jobs. I've always wondered how in the world they got the numbers they got. I figured it was always reports from unemployment, but that really is only a small part of the whole puzzle.
Anyways, take a read.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Isn't youthquake a disco tribute band?

Oh wait, that's bootyquake. Never mind.

In any case, this BusinessWeek talks about us and how we hate debt.

Youthquake is alive and well, friends.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Only the things that make or break us...

I don't know about you, but these are exciting times. A new year, a big election, lots of changes in the horizon. Exciting, indeed.

This is hopefully the starting point of a conversation, at least, that's the goal. This isn't a debate about which political candidate is better because this isn't a partisan blog. This is a place for political thought, because the policies and positions in this country affects all M.A.Y.A.'s. In the spirit of full disclosure, I am a registered Independent, but was Republican when I first voted at age 18. Now, I'm looking for the best candidate that can bring about the change (there's that word again!) in this country.

I want to know what people think are the issues that greatly affected M.A.Y.A.s. Remember, M.A.Y.A. is Middle Aged Young Adults, so college-age and up. Here are some ideas, let's see if we can add to it.

1. The Economy. In the past debate, John Edwards mentioned a study that suggested that 20 to 30 million jobs will be lost. In mentioning that study, Edwards stated that those who stand to lose the most will be college graduates. I didn't see that particular study online (does anyone know what it is? Send me the link and I'll hook it up), but if that's true, that is huge. It directly conflicts with the perpetual narrative that college and post-graduate education is the remedy for lost jobs, in the manufacturing sector and otherwise. If specialty work is thinning, it does force professional works to take up jobs where they do exist in large amounts. In the case of today's economy, that's service and retail. But, many jobs don't provide a living wage and benefits, so it's either multiple jobs or other supplemental work.
It seems like society is in transition and the economic component is rapidly changing. Questions of the role of digital in the changing economy, the morphing of manufacture and the rejection of corporate America. Most of the rhetoric aims toward restore industrial jobs, because of the previous generations. However, with our generation, what does the job field look like? What is the role of government in encouraging change? And what about this abolishing of the income tax?

2. Health care. It's my opinion that health care is the leading domestic issue in America. It's agreed that something is very, very wrong when costs are $2 trillion, yet, almost 200 million Americans were not insured at some point in the past two years. The two political parties are offering two very different philosophies on the role of government in health care. Fundamentally, is health care a basic right that the government must provide Americans under the Preamble where the government is to promote the "common welfare and secure ourselves and our Posterity?" Is health care a commodity that is accessible only to those to access the market? Someone in between?

3. The War. Iraq is the result of a way of thinking. What is the role of America in the world? If the world is our neighbor, how do we treat our neighbors? More so, is it the role of government to attack and declare war on religious groups, knowing that religious extremism is only defeated by moderates of the same religion?

4. Social justice. At the root of most of society's ills is a lack of commitment to justice. What does justice look like today? How do we address systemic poverty? Discrimination? Hate? Is social justice the duty of government or the individual? Both? Neither?

5. The Environment. Put simply, the Earth doesn't need humans, but humans need the Earth. I feel that climate change is the symptom of the greater problem, which is waste. Waste in the sense that we use what we do not need, as we have taken excess as a barometer of success, not illness. With overpopulation and nations taking on their own industrial revolution in the same wasteful manner that the U.S. developed, we got more problems coming. What do we do?

Those are four that stick out for me. What else is important? Are none of these things important? As we move to our own adulthood, what is the road toward responsibility and growth? What's the road toward something else entirely?

Let's talk.

Friday, December 28, 2007

GO!

Well, just as soon as it came, 2007 is about to leave.

Such a blur, such a dream.

If my calculations are correct, I'm officially past the "young and stupid" phase of the M.A.Y.A. development scheme and can still claim "student" status for the next seven years, but only on a forbearance basis only. Let's hope I don't have to do that.

I've spoken in other places about the completion of the stuff from the five-year wish list and other such things. Frankly, I've reached the limit of my development at this stage of my life. It's not that I'm running out of new things to say, it's that the ground has been covered and re-covered already. It's time to go.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Quarter is 25, right?

The new online show "Quarterlife" is now on MySpace TV. I've only seen the first episode and it look promising. There is talk that it'll be on NBC sometime next season because they are in dire need.
In either case, it'll be interesting to see how they genuinely resonate about issues of twentysomethings. It is by the same people that did "Thirtysomething," so they have a thing for generational stuff.

In other news, my brain is mush because I finished my first draft of my thesis yesterday, but I promise to start doing more next week.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

I'm investing in a good time instead of a good mutual fund...

Raise your hand if you freaked out about retirement in the past 24 hours.

If you're 35 and younger, I see that hand not raised.

Honestly, unless you're a heavy investor and are trying to catch up to Buffett and Gates, most M.A.Y.A.'s don't think about much about retirement, investing, or even savings.
A MSNBC article on slacker savings talks about the same things. Frankly, Gen Xers aren't saving much and consultants fret about not having clients with disposable income in 25 years. One company has created the GendeX Mutual Fund, an investment portfolio geared to the Gen X crowd. Only requiring $100 to enroll and a mutual fund package that includes investments in Apple and American Apparel. Not shabby, even if the fees are a bit expensive.
Investing doesn't have the same ring to it as it did for my parent's generation. Mostly, people want to buy a house (which I've already done, and let me tell you, be VERY CAREFUL) and enjoy life.

I'm sure there are various reasons, but in my opinion, the main issue is that framing the future isn't the same for this generation as it has been for previous generations. There is no set period to retire, as there is no set period to work. In that I mean that people will work in many different places and probably do a few different things. The initial plan of 401(k) and pensions were based upon compensation for staying with one company. As it is with health care, that simply isn't the case anymore.
Plus, what do you invest in? Mutual funds are quickly becoming a business with service products. Honestly, how many of your friends now sell some sort of insurance and investment plans?
Even fundamental, the growing gap in costs vs. salaries is beyond ridiculous and combined with a deficit philosophy, it's nearly a necessity that people borrow. While personal finance "gurus" can write column and column on how to live within your means and how not to eat sushi all the item to cut down on debt, it's disingenuous to those that have to be in debt to survive. That doesn't even get into loans for education...don't get me started on that.

If anyone wants to truly encourage saving and investment, it has to be in the rubric of values and realities that actually are values and realities. Mutual fund packages have to be smaller, creating more opportunity for diversity and long-term growth. More emphasis has to be on more choice in companies to invest in (yay sustainable investing!) and more options in alleviating and refinancing debt.

We aren't slackers, we're smarter than that and understand that the values of prosperity and livelihood has changed. Maybe Wall Street and MSNBC will get that someday.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Tribal rule 1: You do not talk about Fight Club...

Tonight, I saw tribalism at work.
Honestly, I would say that I've seen tribalism at work my entire life. It's not that hard to find.
In particular, social groups and friendship circles are tribalism in this day and age. More so, there is nothing more tribal than a church youth group that evolves into the church young adult group.
Growing up, I belonged to a church youth group. I use the word belonged loosely because I always felt like the outsider, but for the purposes of this, I belonged to the group. The church I spent most of my adolescence in was relatively small, but a close-knit bunch. The church branded itself a family church and that mentality permeated everything. I would say there was about 20-25 of us that were very close in the church context. We sat together, hung out together after services and ran the Sunday School. Mostly, we played volleyball. Frankly, it was akin to a cult ritual. Every Wednesday before youth service, every Thursday when we traveled to Huntington Beach and the high holy holiday, the Memorial Day Picnic, we played volleyball.
Yet outside of the church, we were complete strangers. We went to different high schools and while we might congregate at the Bible Club during the week (well, not at my high school), we didn't associate in the same peer groups and pretty much didn't acknowledge each other's existence.
It's an odd dichotomy. Outside the religious sphere, the same concept is prevalent. Most people in their 20s and 30s--maybe even their 40s--band together. It's almost like the new family, except that it isn't a family. There are family values, for sure. But the shared interests are in things to do, not things people are.
But the church youth group I grew up in was a tribe. And like tribes in the past, once you leave the tribe, it's near impossible to return. You're out, you are out.

I bring this up because much of the people that formed the tribe of the church group I grew up in have formed another tribe at another church. Because of school and such, I don't associate with most people from way back then. Every so often, I'll see them at social gatherings. Nevertheless, nothing has changed. Just like it was for me when I was younger, they hang out together, go to parties together, club together, then go to church on Thursday night together. Since they are older than 21, they really drink together. Really, really drink together. Tonight, many of them were in the back yard of a house, listening to bad 80s music before the cops came and cleared out the joint.

In a way, I feel sorry for them. I used to think they are stuck and combined with an environment that doesn't encourage growth, they have nothing to gain from growing up. Yet, I'm starting to understand it know as just another expression of something that is deeply rooted in all of us: the desire to belong. That transcends religious and secular.

With a tribe comes tribal rules. They are different for each tribe, but usually they go along these lines: Join the tribe, take on the values of the tribe, stay within the boundaries of the tribe and most important, don't join another tribe. Once the tribe is set, other members have to go through an initiation of some sort to join. Once you're in, you are in.

I wonder what is the difference between a tribe and a community. There are community values and expectations and roles that people play, just like a tribe, a group and a family. Those things are common, but what are the differences? Like I said, the instances where people said something was a community was really a tribe. My church upbringing was tribal in every sense of the word. APU's attempt at being a tribe and calling it community is laughable and yet quite sad.
So, what's a community? How does community work for those that are waiting to get married until later, having children until later and taking longer to ascertain identity and commitment? Is community worth sacrificing individual wants and desires?

NOTE: I often wonder if people reading this and other blogs are taking these as advice to stay the hell away from religion. I come from a religious viewpoint, yet it really has nothing to do with religion. What I trying to do in my quirky at 2 a.m. way is make sense of the dynamics in people being in groups and it becoming more than hanging out with friends on a Friday night. But I do caution anyone and everyone to never attend a church that says it's a "family church." Trust me.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Transcribing a paradox

It's almost midnight on Thursday and I find myself in a peculiar position.

Before I go on, I have to say that it is very peculiar to have to bless yourself after you sneeze. Try it sometime. It feels weird, trust me.

Anyways, I'm trying to motivate myself to further the transcription of the interviews for my thesis. I should be done with them by this weekend, which was the goal and I should be done with the first draft by November 15, which was the goal as well. However, I've hit that point that I knew I would hit when I first took this topic and idea on a few months back. I thought I had prepared myself for when this moment came, yet the moment has come and I'm truly not prepared.

My topic is religious identity and interfaith relations, specifically with this organization in Los Angeles. I wanted to observe an interfaith community and see how they deal with religious identity on a personal and collective level. So far, so good. The problem is that this topic doesn't lend itself to a nice, tidy thesis that such topics as "Why MySpace is factually the Anti-Christ" or "Branding cheese in the 21st Century" do. Not dissing anyone else studying cheese, but this was the decision I made.
By going through these interviews and meetings and examining the research and what is happening, it becomes obvious that this is just the starting point. It's not even the starting point, it's the point that one starts. There is a very long, robust, diverse documentation that needs to be done out there, much longer and better than this clunky thesis for a clunky masters.
Nevertheless, here it is. I refuse to give absolutes because there are no absolutes. I refuse to create theories because one theory works in one context and another theory works in another context. Plus, academia is for wimps.
Thus, what in God's name do I write about?

It really dovetails into my current state of mind at the moment. There is SO MUCH out there, SO MUCH to do, SO MUCH to see, SO MUCH to experience, SO MUCH to live. Where does one start with SO MUCH? Annie Lamott would say start where you're at. Right now, I start at a paradox: the urgency to make money because I'm about to run out of reserves and I want to leave L.A. and breathe new air (literally) and finally create a community and finally meet somebody and finally start a family; and the patience to wait for the hottest coal that's burning, the patience to wait for the right time, the right place, the right girl, the right (....).

That is the paradox of the bridge from kid to adult. At some point, values and priorities are going to line up and take their place. When the list solidifies, the moment comes when you wake up in the middle of the night or somehow stop cold in your tracks and you have to pay attention. You have to care.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Yep, the brakes work...

It has been a while since a last post.

I was driving on the 110 this morning for the last observation of the group I'm studying for my thesis. The meet starts at 7 and, with a quick stop at Starbucks, it takes about one hour to get there from home.
I know all about L.A. traffic. Sans San Angelo, I'm a L.A. boy. That might change soon, but sticking with the now, I'm a L.A. boy.
And yet, it seem amazes me how crappy the traffic is at 6 in the morning. Long stretches of breezy cruising, then, the sudden stop because they built the damn freeway goofy.
Hitting that sudden stop and going stop and go until I reach Exposition Blvd., I thought this was a great metaphor for life. It might be stops and starts for a while, then a long stretch of cruising, then the sudden stop to make sure you don't hit the person in front of you.
Of course, this is at 6 a.m., pre-coffee, mid-straining to finish my thesis and post-trying to figure out metaphors on how to live life.

I haven't decided if this past year and a half was a cruise, a slow crawl or just a turn on the surface streets. In any case, it is about to end all too soon. Or maybe it's all too late?
That I'm not sure of either.

Eh, no matter. Life moves forward, traffic continues to get better and worse and luckily, I won't have to be waking up at 5 a.m. for some time.
Until I get a job, that is.

In other matters, I'm making a concerted effort to keep the M.A.Y.A. Years going. Trying to engage the shift toward a standard that seems to always be changing.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Eye-catching evidence...

Here's a brief article on how red eyes are ruining your life.

  • Red eyes suck
  • Friday, June 29, 2007

    What's this I see?

    About a week and a half ago, I was walking into the parking garage of a building in the Westside after coming out of a very important meeting as to the direction of my life (more to come later), and as I finished saying goodbye to my friend/business partner, I briefly saw myself in the side window of my car.

    In that ever-so brief moment, I saw me in my charcoal suit, with my white shirt and dare I say, dashing red tie. I saw my hair slightly disheleved, but still intact, my face relatively clear and my possibilities beaming.

    In that moment, I saw a man staring back at me.

    I quickly jumped into my car and got the hell out of there.

    Wednesday, May 23, 2007

    M.A.Y.A. Music Addict

    I've been a music nut for as long as I can remember--even back to my early elementary school days when I had my own record player and a stack of records I'd borrowed from my parents. As the years went by, my music obsession grew and evolved. There was my rap phase, my hard rock phase, my angry chick phase, etc. Somewhere along the way, though, I became concerned that I might one day become too grown-up for good, cutting-edge music, that there would be a magic age when I had to listen to the lame-ass "lite rock" radio station they play in doctors' offices. A magic age when contemporary music became irrelevant to my life. Or too loud. Or too offensive. And I feared this age.

    I still believe that. I still believe there must be a point when everything changes, when I prefer the music of my youth to the music of "today," whenever that day is. I wonder when it will come?

    In the meantime, I'll keep obsessing. I'm currently in a music phase best described as "wildly eclectic." I bought three new CDs this week: Linkin Park, Amy Winehouse, and Maroon 5. I'm 27 years old, and I still have no problem blasting each in my car with my windows rolled down and the bass rattling my rear view mirror so badly I can't use it.

    Wednesday, May 16, 2007

    Two roads to odd greatness...

    Two things happened today that were of unusual importance to me.
    First, the Rev. Jerry Falwell passed away. Most celebrated this news with chinking of coffee mugs and statements of how the disenfranchised can rejoice and hope that Pat Robertson suffers the same fate in an expedited manner. In my opinion, it is the classic case of absolute power corrupting absolutely. The man lost his mind in the course of trying to change the American political landscape, which he did to a certain degree.

    My grandfather went to college with Falwell in Missouri and mentioned that he was a very nice and earnest man. This is no doubt about Falwell's earnestness and sincerity. In fact, it was his earnestness that prompted a life-changing moment for me. I was living at the Willmore in Long Beach and was watching Meet the Press before leaving for church. On this show, Russert has brought together Richard Land, head of the Southern Baptist convention, Al Sharpton, Jim Wallis, head of Sojourners (and a big favorite of Linterella and me) and Falwell. They were to talk about the state of American religion. Did they ever. It took about, oh, three minutes before the shouting and hexing up to the other person's great-grandchildren was in full swing.

    What was unique about this conversation was the question Falwell asked Jim Wallis. "Who did you vote for?" Falwell inquired. Wallis answered that he voted for John Kerry, to which Falwell responded that he was in direct violation of Scripture and should resign from the pastorate immediately. Everyone was shocked and I was dumbfounded.
    And thus the conversation went. I contributed to the discussion by saying a few "holy profanities" at a pretty loud level and then huffed out. On the way to church, I wondered aloud how we as Christians got to this point and felt genuine compassion over those that might have legitimate questions about faith, hear these morons and get turned off. In the midst of my own whining, I was impressed with this simple statement: "Well, what are you going to do about all of this?"

    Tonight at All Saints, Paul Hawken was speaking and signing copies of his new book, "Blessed Unrest." Hawken wrote the book "The Ecology of Commerce," which has altered my thinking about the affairs of the world and life. His website is linked under "What are they thinking?" and I highly recommend checking out his stuff. It has completely slipped my mind that he was speaking until I saw his book in Borders yesterday and freaked out that it was last night. Luckily, it was tonight and I arrived just in time. (I hate L.A. traffic. Let me say that again. I hate L.A. traffic.)

    During the talk, Hawken spoke about how there is an inherent mystery and wonder to how life works. For example, the immune system is the most complex process of a person. We have an understanding of how it works and when it works, but there is still so much to be learned about WHY it works. That is still a mystery. The processes of time and energy allow for history to take shape and cycle in the ultimate hope of true, lasting progress. There is over a million organizations that operate to help improve life. Environmental, social justice, economical, religious, local, global...people are at work seeking to change the world by changing their world.

    Hawken's work really opened my eyes to a greater appreciation of the process, the journey. That was emphasized by this statement: You cannot change the world on your own, so stop trying. You cannot control results and outcomes, so stop the ways of control. The only thing that you can do is control your intention.
    As T.S. Eliot said, "All you have in life is the trying, the rest is none of your business."

    I have a greatness complex: I want to be great. I want to do great things. In the name of Christ, in the name of good, healthy Christianity. In the name of saving the world. In the name of saving myself. Our generation has a greatness complex. The powers that pee have deemed that we as M.A.Y.A.s have the access, the skills, the mindset and the opportunities to do things that have yet to be achieved. I think I have safely say that the pressure is overwhelming. That is why people get degrees they don't need, take jobs they don't want and make decisions that shouldn't be made. That is a fundamental reason why adolescence flows into the 30s and probably further and why no one is in a hurry to become an adult.

    So, you want to be great? Well, great in what? Working? Drinking? Finding the next big idea? Those answers are elusive, and that is because they don't exist. Moreover, greatness is found not in singularity, but rather community. Not fake, overpriced Christian college "chapel is the greatest thing in the world" community, but honest-to-God and honest-to-yourself community.

    Rev. Falwell knew this. The Moral Majority and the Religious Right wanted to be great. They were great because they were right, but it wasn't just the subtle satisfaction of being on the right fence of eternity that was the focal point. It was the quest to exude their sense of rightness from the top down, because if everyone saw how right and how great they were, then the world would be as it should be. Christ would make an encore appearance, and the universe is right as rain. It's not that it was a Christian idea, but that it was Jerry Falwell's Christian idea. In his eyes, the ACLU caused God to enact 9/11 and that anyone who is pro-choice is violating God's laws.

    I look at Jerry Falwell and look at Paul Hawken and the thousands of people that are working to make a difference and I see two paths which lead to greatness. Again, as I am a Christian, I don't view Rev. Falwell as a bad person. I just think he was part of the system that we wanted to change. I'm sure there was a time when that fire to bring forth the things that society needs was there, but like so many others, it gets lost in the quest for complete assimilation. And while I do disagree on Hawken on a few issues, he provides a viewpoint for a new systems theory in how we conduct business, engage in politics and commune with nature.

    I say both paths lead to greatness based on the definitions of greatness that are offered. Is one great based on adhering to tents of faith, even to the minutiae on how one votes for or not? Is one great on making small, seemingly insignificant decisions that lack short-term profitability? They both offer a sense of hope and more important, a vision. How can things be? How should things be?

    And that is the question I am asked. And that's the question we as M.A.Y.A.s are asked.

    Friday, April 06, 2007

    To believe in God or not to believe in God..that really isn't the question...

    Newsweek carried an intriguing debate between Pastor Rick Warren of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest and Sam Harris, a renowned atheiest who wrote the book, "A Letter to a Christian Nation," that I really want to read.
    These types of subjects come up around this time because of Easter and Passover and whatnot. I'm rather happy though that Newsweek especially does a pretty good job in being thorough about religious topics. The interview between Warren and Harris shows that, as does editor's Jon Meachem's great article.
    Here's the link here:
  • Warren/Harris debate


  • I do have to say that Rabbi Marc Gellman is quickly becoming one of my favorite writers. He has such a strong pragmatism that is rooted in rich spiritual ideals. He responds to the debate and the article with the concept that both are right. In the end, what you believe in God really is contingent about what you believe about life, the world and yourself.

    Here's his response:
  • Gellman's response


  • Have a great Easter and Passover, and no matter you're beliefs, have a good weekend.

    Monday, April 02, 2007

    Grades, grades, go away...

    I am now firmly convinced that graduate school shouldn't have grades. Here's why:
    There comes a point, at least I hope there comes a point, where people should be "graded" on true analysis and comprehension. A professor should be able to engage a student on any particular topic with feedback and commentary, but in the end, the end result shouldn't be some dumb letter.
    I understand the need of it for high school and maybe for undergrad. But this is grad school, you're here because you want to be here and you're paying a hell of a lot of money to learn. In the end, I'm here for the entire education, not for a piece of paper. Because of that, I want to feel like I can write how I feel I should write and engage the issues that need to be engaged...and not worry about the damn grade.
    For example, I wrote a 30-page paper for my corporate communication class. I'm not sure how well I did, but I can tell you that I and the rest of my classmates are worried like hell about the grade we're gonna get. That's too bad. I would rather the professor write all over my paper and dismiss my arguments and my rhetoric, then I can respond and have a discussion instead of write a paper, get a grade and that defines my standing in the class.

    It's almost as if there's the underlying idea that you're going to get graded on how well you did in life. It's not just a pass/fail, credit/no credit ideal, but somehow God/higher power/keeper of the Great Beyond is giving out a report card. You lived a B-plus life. How the hell can you live a B-plus life? Had the potential, but didn't make a full effort? You didn't answer the questions correctly or didn't format your M.A.Y.A. years right?

    Wouldn't be the worst: you get up to Heaven and God tells you that the content was good, but the formatting wasn't correct. I'm sure there an existential metaphor there somewhere...

    Friday, March 30, 2007

    Not the blast from the cinematic past I would want...

    Last week, a bunch of mutant reptiles knocked off half-naked Greeks from the box office perch. Only in America...
    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, or TMNT as they are now known, was the top movie last weekend, taking in $24.5 million. The turtles' reign won't last long because the new Will Ferrell movie comes in, which I'm seeing tonight and I'm pretty jazzed to check out.
    While it was a decent success in the general audience, Warner Bros. was banking on twenty-somethings to take a stroll down memory lane in seeing the movie. It has been about 16 years since the last TMNT movie came out, and that was when the comic book and TV show was in its heyday. Later on this summer, Optimus Prime and the rest of the Transformers will make its way to the big screen. Michael Bay is bringing his Armageddon barrage of pyrotechnic greatness, so you know some robot is going to blow up the world.
    I remember seeing the old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle films. I even think I have a VHS copy somewhere in the garage. I wasn't much into Transformers: I was actually a big ThunderCats fan, so I'm hoping any studio that does that won't royally screw it up.
    In this post-9/11 era, people are clamoring for heroes. That's why 300 is so big. Harry Potter is a hero to both adults and kids. In real life, we try to find heroes whenever we can. Anyone remember Jessica Lynch? I last saw her on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition build a house for her friend who died in Iraq. But for that brief second, she was a hero, partially for propaganda purposes, but because citizens genuinely needed a good story.
    I find it intriguing that we are reach back into the not-so-distant pasts of our childhood to find more heroes. What heroes do we M.A.Y.A.s have? G.I. Joe, Masters of the Universe, TMNT, ThunderCats, Transformers, even Batman and the Justice League. Now with Captain America dead, it is the job of animated turtles to help reclaim that sense of serenity found on reading comic books with friends or watching Saturday morning television.
    Plus, the studio system doesn't come up with anything new anymore ... in a way, movie studios are the best example on how to properly recycle. It's quite tragic, I must say.

    Sunday, February 25, 2007

    Lint's Oscar Picks

    I'm running out of time, so I'll forgo the explanations...

    BEST PICTURE: Little Miss Sunshine
    ACTOR: Forest Whitaker
    ACTRESS: Helen Mirren
    SUP. ACTOR: Eddie Murphy
    SUP. ACTRESS: Jennifer Hudson
    ANIMATED FEATURE: Cars
    ART DIRECTION: Dreamgirls
    CINEMATOGRAPHY: Children of Men
    COSTUME DESIGN: Marie Antoinette
    DIRECTING: The Departed
    DOC FEATURE: An Inconvenient Truth
    DOC SHORT: Two Hands
    FILM EDITING: United 93
    FOREIGN LANGUAGE: Pan's Labyrinth
    MAKEUP: Pan's Labyrinth
    ORIGINAL SCORE: The Queen
    ORIGINAL SONG: "Love You I Do"
    SHORT ANIMATED: The Little Matchgirl
    SHORT LIVE ACTION: Eramos Pocos
    SOUND EDITING: Pirates
    SOUND MIXING: Apocalypto
    VISUAL EFFECTS: Pirates
    SCREENPLAY ADAPTED: The Departed
    SCREENPLAY ORIGINAL: Little Miss Sunshine

    Saturday, February 24, 2007

    the official M.A.Y.A. Years Oscar picks (well, at least my picks.)

    I am proud to say that I have won whatever Oscar pool I have been in five out of the past six years. The one year I didn't do so well was the year I put money on it. I learned my lesson.

    this year, the Oscars have snuck up on me. I FINALLY finished all the best picture films this week, so I feel set to make my official predictions. Come back tomorrow night, so I can gloat. Yay.
    Oh, I'm only going to put the major categories. I didn't get to see all the animated shorts. Sorry.

    Best Picture:
    Should win: Little Miss Sunshine. Truthfully, this wasn't that great of a year for movies. Of course, I saw some phenomenal stuff, but as a whole...eh. However, I saw Little Miss Sunshine up in Monterey during a spontaneous trip before school started. It was in this small theater with a bunch of old people. Oh man, it was AWESOME. I have never heard a more pleased group of geriatrics. It was great. This is a typical comedy format, but the writing and acting give it freshness and vitality.
    The other movies were good. I really liked Letters from Iwo Jima and it makes me want to see Flags of our Fathers. I dug The Queen...it was a lot different than what I expected. The Departed was a hoot, even though the film burnt out in the cheap-o theater I saw it in. I liked Babel, but wasn't that impressed, really.
    Will win: Most likely Babel, but I'm going to go on a limb and say that Little Miss Sunshine will pull off the upset. I think it might happen.
    The REAL best movie of the year: Pan's Labyrinth. Oh good lord was that amazing!!!!

    Best actor:
    Should win: I didn't see Venus, but I'm gonna say Peter O'Toole because it's a tragedy that he never won for Lawrence of Arabia.
    Will win: Forest Whitaker. Dude, he rocked it in Last King of Scotland. That movie would have been a shell of a story if it wasn't for his performance.

    Best Actress:
    Should win: Helen Mirren. She was Queen Elizabeth II. I saw the actual Queen when I was in England. Mirren had her down to a tee. On the other hand, Kate Winslet is the best actor/actress this side of 30. Little Children was unbelievably good...worthy of a best picture nod.
    Will win: Helen Mirren.

    Best Supporting Actor:
    Should win: Alan Arkin. He gave a level of depth that is very nuanced in this movie. A close second is Jackie Earle Haley who put in a haunting performance in Little Children. He's not only a feel-good story, he's really a great actor.
    Will win: Eddie Murphy. Honestly, his performance was good, but not great, but he'll win.

    Best Supporting Actress:
    Should win: Jennifer Hudson. The only lock in any of these categories. Aside from her, Dreamgirls was highly overrated.
    Will win: Jennifer Hudson.

    Best Director:
    Should win: Martin Scorsese. If he doesn't win, there is no justice in the world.
    Will win: Scorsese, or else the mob is putting a hit on all the Academy voters.

    Best Documentary:
    An Unconvenient Truth. I don't care if you agree with global warming or not, go see this movie.

    Best Foreign film:
    I would like to take this brief opportunity and thank Guerillmo Del Toro for sticking to his guns and creating one of the best freaking movies I have seen in quite a while. I would also like to thank the country of Mexico for allowing such great directors to come into being. And I would finally like to the thanks the parents of Maribel Verdu for having sex and creating her. (She plays a crucial role in Pan's Labyrinth. Also, if you've seen Y Tu Mama Tambien, which I highly recommend you do, then you'll understand.)
    Oh: Pan's Labyrinth better win this category.

    Best Adapted Screenplay:
    Should win: Borat. Borat should have also been nominated for best picture and Sasha Baron Cohen should have nominated for best actor. He would had won if that would had happened. Alas, this great movie only gets some due in this category.
    Will win: The Departed.

    Best Original Screenplay:
    This one is actually a toughie. All the screenplays were very cool and rather strong.
    Should win: Pan's Labyrinth.
    Will win: Probably Babel.


    OK, as a last bit: here's my picks for the top five movies of the year. Like I said, this wasn't that strong of a year, but there were some really good movies.

    1. Pan's Labyrinth. Just too good to be overlooked.
    2. Borat. The genius is not in the character, but in the mirror it shows America.
    3. The Fountain. I lot of people hated it. I loved it. I loved it for its purity and for its vision.
    4. Little Children. What made this so good was that this could really happen and does happen. Everywhere and anywhere.
    5. Little Miss Sunshine. Too good, too cute.

    Tuesday, February 06, 2007

    Neil Postman lives on and on and on...

    For those fans of the late philosopher Neil Postman, or those remembering Dr. Ganas's Senior Seminar, I found this article on The Disappearance of Childhood. I have not read that book and I wasn't a fan of Technopoly, but in my old age, I might reconsider.
    Enjoy.

    >Childhood

    Saturday, February 03, 2007

    Alicia's Story

    I stumbled across Alicia's Story yesterday. It's a series in the San Francisco Chronicle written by a M.A.Y.A. battling one of the rarest forms of cancer: alveolar soft part sarcoma. Alicia was first diagnosed almost two years ago, at age 23 (three years after her own mother died of breast cancer), and she chronicles every test and treatment and emotion along the way.

    At the end of chapter one, Alicia wrote: "If I get through this, this story will help me remember the important moments along the way, the details, the dizzying emotions. And, in the worst of all circumstances, if I go through this life-changing ordeal and my body just wears out and I die, I will die a writer. The one thing I've always wanted to be."

    Read it. You won't regret it.

  • Alicia's Story
  • Wednesday, January 24, 2007

    So, maybe the pre-historic people had the right idea...

    This article ran in Sunday's L.A. Times. It deals perfectly about the shift in marriage and relationships. This author makes the point that what we understand as the "proper" view of marriage may not be what is most effective for both males and females.
    Have a read:
  • here
  • Tuesday, January 16, 2007

    Is that wedding bells I hear...oh, just my ears ringing...

    I do have to say that it's quite ironic that there is no one but me and the owner in Cafe Young and Lazy.
    I personnally enjoy this place specificially for that reason. Faster Wi-Fi, good organic coffee and no reasons to slack off other than the ones I conjure up.

    The new semester is in full swing, thus the late start to 2007 for the M.A.Y.A. Years. These next four months will challenge me in ways I haven't been challenged before, so I'll apologize up front for the lack of frequency, but I promise to be as consistent as possible.

    A story spoke of how unmarried women now dominate the census landscape. There are now more unmarried people than married people. Either folks are getting married later in life, or choosing to live with a partner or partners.

    I might be completely off-base here, but I've always surmised that the cultural understanding is that women are in more of a pressing need to be married than men. The economical gap and the desire to have a two-parent household has always made this so.
    Of course, that isn't the case anymore, which is a great thing. However, the side effect of all of this is the shifting from a communal society to an individualistic society. In essence, the need of community and coupleship has altered in its definitions and forms. Community now comes with friends intead of spouses as the predominate factor. Self-reliance and actualization are tops in the life goals of people. I think of myself as an individual first, rather than a member of society first.

    What does this mean for marriage? I'm not sure. I can say that this means a lot for the M.A.Y.A. Years. The first focus isn't on getting a wife, but rather establishing your life. Then maybe you can get married...maybe. Folks are having sex at an earlier age and the quest for intimacy takes on a different variable.

    I do wonder...what is this doing to men? In my opinion, it is men who need to be married more than women. It is men who need a community more than women. Some would point to the presence of patriarchy as evidence. I think that is true to a point. But I feel the fundamental issue is the desire for connection for men, which I feel is different from women (of course, I speak this as a dude, so there you go.)
    Men have gained an identity from being the man of the house, the head of the household, the leader of most things. That desire is inherent in most men. But as society shifts to self first, couple maybe, I wonder how masculinity and manhood will adapt, if it will at all.

    I mean, God said, "It is not good that man should be alone." I think God was on to something.

    What do you think?