What is an adult?
Yeah, I know. It's an absolutely ridiculous question.
Or is it?
I want to get your thoughts on this question, but let me throw out this idea and see if it sticks:
Our society lacks a rite of passage--a clear point from childhood to adulthood. Because of this, the blurring of the lines between adolescence and adulthood are now creating individuals that are adult in a physical sense, but not in a societal sense. In essence, we have a generation that is stuck in the gap.
When I was growing up, I was told this is the path to my life...My time in junior high school (assuming I would survive it) would prepare me for my time in high school. My time in high school would then prepare me for my time in college. My time in college would then prepare me for a career and thus, the rest of my life. By the time college was over, I would be free to consider myself an adult.
I can say with a good amount of certainty that is how most of the majority of society that are "adults" view the linear line of life (oooh, alliteration...wow, college did help with something). Society views living as on a straight line; a life start at birth to adolescence to adulthood to old age to eventually death. Of course, there are deviations in the course of humanity, but for the most part, everyone's life follows this path.
And within this path are markers, points where one can point to her/his life and know what was going on at this point in time. High school graduation is a marker for the end of adolescence, as one is now an adult in the legal sense. Biologically, puberty is a marker for the beginning of adulthood, and the cracking voice serves as a daily reminder on the value of a good sense of humor to make it through life's woes.
Most of those markers have a rite of passage, some commemoration of the end of one life phase and the start of another. Graduation is one, growing a beard is another. Cultures have understood the value of rite of passages to mark the transition from one stage of living to another. A 13-year-old is considered a man or a woman upon the reading of the Torah in the Jewish tradition. Latino girls become women at their Quinceanera. Most Asian cultures recognize the same rite of passage.
In America, we have nothing of the sort. While some would say that college could be seen as that particular rite of passage, the reality is that college has become a stepping stone to the saga known as young adulthood, and the emphasis is on young, as in "I'm going to act like a child because this is time to party, as it's on the parent's and Uncle Sam's dime!" young. It really doesn't do the trick.
So, what are we left with? Well, for one, the M.A.Y.A. Years. More so, society is left with old children, hoping to never grow up.
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3 comments:
There are just as many signposts in adulthood as there are in childhood; you just don't get cakes and balloons for passing them. One of the largest is the attainment of serenity -- living every hour in the overstuffed easy chair of your life, complete with the rips and stains of your mistakes. Realizing that you've moved beyond this rite of passage is much more satisfying than high school graduation or a quinceanera. --- Thanks for the invite to your blog, Plunk. Hope all is well. Randy McCoach, age 42.
So here are some of my random thoughts on this question of adulthood. . .
I would have to say that while our society has progressed in many ways and has allowed women to have just as many professional possibilities as men, there is still a certian amount of adulthood that is not attained until one has "settled down" and gotten married and then culminated the end of ones own childhood, by bringing their own offspring into the world to care for. Now this really frustrates me but it seems to be so evident that my married with children friends who are the exact same age and career level as I am are considered more "adult" then I am!
Also, on another note. . . it was recently proposed to me that perhaps this new MAYA stage that we are seeing more in our generation is a result of how we were raised as the children of boomers? And by them being so properous and providing so much for us they are not allowing us to grow up and become adults. Any thoughts?
no rite of passage in america? psssh, you've obviously never watched my super sweet sixteen on mtv!
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